Wednesday, May 21, 2008

One Year Bloggerversary . . .

What? Nobody bought me a cake?

When I started this blog one year ago today, my goal was to finally write down all the incredibly brilliant points about, well, everything that I, much to the good fortune of those around me, make everyday. And, yes, you faithful visitors have, unfortunately, witnessed only a SMALL portion of my genius.

However, I have discovered that I'm a better talker than a writer. The reason is that I'm very poor at preparation and organization of thoughts. My phenomenal brain seems to work best off the cuff and without the speed bump that is my incredibly fast, but ultimately inadequate typing speed. For some reason, typing throws my brain off rhythm.

No problem again, you say. Just record yourself while you're in the zone. Tried it - didn't work. You see my incredible brain knows that my voice sounds horrific on tape. So when I try to record myself, it goes on strike. All of a sudden I'm stupid. In fact, if my brain gets anymore independent, I'll have to call it Hal and figure out a way to shut it down.

With that said, I have concluded it is time for me to shut this blog down.


Just kidding. :)


Here's my prediction for the next year:

1. I'll get an agent
2. I'll get published
3. You'll buy it, read it, cry, laugh, and tell all your friends about it.

predictions for the next 3 years:

1. Daylemania will sweep the nation.
2. T-shirt sales alone will surpass one-hundred-dollars.
3. I'll tell Oprah her show isn't big enough for me.
3. My dog will write a tell-all book and appear on Oprah where he'll destroy my career when he reveals that he actually wrote my books through telepathy and I didn't even upgrade his tennis ball with all the money I stole from him.

10 comments:

Kay said...

well, um, al I can think of to say to that is Happy Bloggerversary and may all your dreams come true... I guess.

Mark H. said...

Well, at least you haven't offended close family members with your blog in the past year. But I guess you'd have to be a complete idiot to do something like that!

(whistling)

Anyway, don't worry about your posts. Just be yourself. It works just fine.

Todd said...

I completely disagree! Which, by the way, is another milestone. This is my one-thousandth "official" disagreement with you. I have been saving it up for this barely auspicious occasion.

See, you forget that some of us also interact with you in real life. I can say with authority that you are no better talking than you are writing.

For just a moment I thought you really were shutting down the blog - it made me happy.

Of course you know that's my way of saying congratulations and keep up the good work. I'll be scanning the headlines for signs of Dayle-mania.

Oh, and as your self-appointed official blog critic I am compelled to point out that you posted that at 12:01 am. Your first post was not until 12:55 am. You were 54 minutes premature with your celebration.

You're welcome!

donna fleisher said...

You mean Daylemania is not, at this moment, sweeping the nation?

(Okay, it's tough to top your previous commenters. That was my very lame attempt. No wonder I already shut my blog down, huh.)

Dayle James Arceneaux said...

Kay, thanks for the comment ... I guess.

Mark, I have no idea who you're talking about.

(whistling)

My secret: I haven't told any close family members about this blog.

I should have never put out that saucer of milk for Todd. Now, I can't get rid of him.

I don't know, Donna. I'm sort of a recluse myself. So, Daylemania could be sweeping the nation as we know it.

But I must make a minor correction. I didn't say which nation Daylemania was sweeping. I'm big in Honduras. There's also a small island in the South Pacific and two counties in Minnesota where I'm considered a minor god.

Nicole said...

Um . . . wow.

XDPaul said...

Keep it up Dayle. I really enjoy your lousy writing and grating voice - two hallmarks of genius.

I believe my ancestors were nearly wiped out in the Daylemania Epidemic of 1882. So you got that going for you.

Dayle James Arceneaux said...

Thanks XD, somehow I knew you'd understand.

As far as 1882 goes, I can only apologize so many times. That is unless you're glad that your ancestors almost got wiped out. Which was the intent of that epidemic in regards to my ancestors.

Janet Rubin said...

happy blogiversary!! Hope all your delusions come true:)

Dayle James Arceneaux said...

That's what America's all about, Janet.